I wouldn't go into the woods today...

And the coup de grace.  That is a creepy poem and I think this is what it's about.

If you go down to the woods today
You're sure of a big surprise
If you go down to the woods today
You'd better go in disguise

ABCDEF3

Ok, so it's not dirty but we wanted something my husband could put in his office and thought it would be funny to teach kid's the alphabet wrong.  One person has ever noticed a problem with it and she knew about my "artwork."  ABCDEF3...HIKJLMNOQ...RRS..TUP..WXYVZ these are not my ABC's you probably shouldn't play with me.

Dog Fart Sluts

I got an email with the subject line "Dog Fart Sluts."

What does that mean! I thought I would save my computer by not clicking on the link to find out.

I decided this girl was probably a dog fart slut.

I should probably do a whole series of spam subject line cross-stitch.

The Fuck You Bears

This one was an anniversary gift to my husband. Not really, but I do refer to the bears with our names. Everyone knows "That's fine" means "Fuck you" in most good marriages. Seriously you can have this up in the middle of your living room and no one will ever notice or comment on it.

Best Friends

I believe "Best Friends" was the next creation. This one may take a couple of minutes to recognize what the picture is. I needed to create one for the boys after Special Moments.

Special Moments

So after Balls I started to get hooked on making these. Friends also started egging me on and helping with ideas. I always liked the peasant people patterns because the people were so simple and innocent looking. I decided I wanted to make a pattern with two peasant girls walking together holding hands with one carrying a big dildo. The clear title, Special Moments. I thought it was extra special if it was a big black dildo.